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Bladesong News

I'm sure by now you've seen the news about former subway spokesman Jared Fogle. No one was more shocked by it than our very own Nismo. When he met Jared they had an instant connection (based on their love for cramming their holes with 6 inches...and rainbows.) After the scandal broke Nismo of course denied ever having spent time with Jared. Our local law enforcement officer Nelthar worked a bit of his magic however and found some proof.

He'll toast your sub

As you can see Nismo clearly liked to toast his subs.... He finally owned up to knowing him after he saw the proof.

But being the kind hearted guild we are we were all very respectful of the situation:


more stuff

Eventually we felt bad enough for him we decided to kill a new mythic to cheer him up:

Nismo cries like a girl

As you can see only 6 or so of us stayed around to witness nismo sitting down crying afterwards. It was a touching scene. Hopefully he can put Jared behind him...wait that's probably not the best way to say that. 


Nismo Hahahahah OMFG THE PHOTOSHOP IM SO DELIGHTED. Can't stop fucking laughing

I was recently called an asshole by a former member of the guild, and to be fair I totally am. Clearly they are a former member for a reason, but it did get me thinking a lot about where Bladesong is and where I want it to be as a raiding guild. We are a low raid hour guild by nature. Most of us don't have the time to commit to raiding 5 nights a week or more so we only do 3 manditory raids of no more than 3 hours normally. In order to make up for this we try to be as prepared as possible when it comes to new encounters. Be that watching videos, studying logs, or reading forums we do our homework. It pays off in a whole lot less time dicking around and a whole lot more time killing bosses, and I'm pretty comfortable with that set up.

As my teenage idol Scrooge McDuck once said, "Work smarter not harder (motherfuckers)" 

I wanna swim in gold coins.

To be completely honest it's been a long time since I saw that cartoon, I may not be quoting him accurately but I'm pretty sure I nailed it. We spend roughly half the time/attempts the guilds keeping up with us do on new boss kills (that we know of, because some of them stopped making logs public due to overwhelming shame.) I guess what I'm trying to say is....Thank's for only being half retarded Bladesong, keep up the marginal work!

Corndog died a few weeks ago but I'm working smarter not harder and grouped his update with other stuff, thanks scrooge you my boy.


We also killed the non bugged version of Mythic Council in about 40 less attempts than other guilds on our server...but I wouldn't know anything about that. 

Bound sucks, deadbeat dads sucks more.

Seriously when you are raiding 5 days a week to keep up with us, can you just quit wow and give us your 3 good players? It will just be less awkward for everyone involved. 

Kyle There's a reason why he's the leader, I berieve.
Nismo Damn Pins is a nigga with attitude

Archimonde is awesome in that he's pretty easy until 25% and then a giant DPS/healing check slaps you in the face like every girl nismo's ever asked out. We probably should have gotten a kill last week but what can you do. We were clearly torn up about losing our best pooper and needed a week to recover.  

Only wiping 37 times on a boss it took the rest of the server 70+ attempts on.

So sweet

We did have a few people finish legendary rings this week as well. Nismo has only almost killed me with the damage sharing proc from the tank ring once so that's some pretty solid design choices blizzard. I don't know about the rest of you but I can't wait to farm archimonde 73 more times to get my ring to max level. Really just some solid choices all around.


I juat want to state this in advance, We will kill 2 Mythic bosses tomorrow, and I'm not going to make an update when we do because they are not worth it. Also we killed Archimonde with Nismo tanking, AND without our number 2 DPS AND with a cop in the raid. We are pretty much playing with one hand tied behind our backs and still keeping up with the rest of the server. You guys need to get your shit together.


Snoop Penis.
Nelthar I'M NOT A COP!!!!
Pins a It's photoshopped to look this way on purpose like all those stupid #justboyfriendthings're ruining the damn ...

Come on in, have some warm cookies he said. What could go wrong I thought as I stepped into his alternate dimension. He tried to kill me. Never trust a dreadlord. I should have known by the name dreadlord that cookies were not on the menu. Son of a...Whatever I killed him...why's everyone looking at me funny It was self defense. 

I didn't touch him!

Nismo took the news really well...


I tried to comfort him...


In other less awesome news, we killed heroic Tyrant on our first night of seeing her. On to Mannoroth!

Tyrant heroic

Nelthar I am really glad I was on to watch the above exchange go down.

I was planning on updating much sooner, but we just kept killing bosses so I decided to wait. In case you haven't tried it out yet. 6.2 is pretty good if you forget about what a giant pain shipyards end up being. Tanaan Jungle is fun although I'm not a huge fan of the rep grinds they put in. Farming up equipment for ships is also REALLY fun. Even when 30 other people are trying to prevent you from killing a whale shark by trying to evade bug it or despawn it because they suck monkey nuts....

WhaleWar2015, never forget

But I digress. They added fun things too! Like the above mentioned Dazzling Rod Team. (We are going pro as soon as a league forms.) This is Krelus somehow cheating and stunning me while we all wait for rare spawns for yet another equipment drop...


On to the stuff people care about though. Hellfire Citadel is pretty amazing. It has some pretty stupid fights (Hellfire assault comes to mind) and some pretty amazing ones (Shadow lord Iskar, Xhul, maybe even Fel Lord Zakuun when I stop being mad about him.) At the time of my posting we are ranked 250ish in the world at 10/13H.

 Shadow lord

The whole team worked pretty hard to get to this point. Some of these fights on Mythic are going to be pretty scary. We even had people come in on an off day to get a few more bosses down since we knew we could do it. Some of them are not included in pictures because they constantly hearth to check on 4 day long shipyard missions but still it's a kill shot.

Heroic Xhul, Mix that fire

Also I thought you should know I tried to take a selfie with everyone but I don't think I did it right. I'm pretty sure I'm too fat to get anyone else in the picture.

Fatty Mcfatterson

Yep. I'm that good. We may not be done yet this week! Hellfire so fun!

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