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Bladesong News

I was planning on updating much sooner, but we just kept killing bosses so I decided to wait. In case you haven't tried it out yet. 6.2 is pretty good if you forget about what a giant pain shipyards end up being. Tanaan Jungle is fun although I'm not a huge fan of the rep grinds they put in. Farming up equipment for ships is also REALLY fun. Even when 30 other people are trying to prevent you from killing a whale shark by trying to evade bug it or despawn it because they suck monkey nuts....

WhaleWar2015, never forget

But I digress. They added fun things too! Like the above mentioned Dazzling Rod Team. (We are going pro as soon as a league forms.) This is Krelus somehow cheating and stunning me while we all wait for rare spawns for yet another equipment drop...


On to the stuff people care about though. Hellfire Citadel is pretty amazing. It has some pretty stupid fights (Hellfire assault comes to mind) and some pretty amazing ones (Shadow lord Iskar, Xhul, maybe even Fel Lord Zakuun when I stop being mad about him.) At the time of my posting we are ranked 250ish in the world at 10/13H.

 Shadow lord

The whole team worked pretty hard to get to this point. Some of these fights on Mythic are going to be pretty scary. We even had people come in on an off day to get a few more bosses down since we knew we could do it. Some of them are not included in pictures because they constantly hearth to check on 4 day long shipyard missions but still it's a kill shot.

Heroic Xhul, Mix that fire

Also I thought you should know I tried to take a selfie with everyone but I don't think I did it right. I'm pretty sure I'm too fat to get anyone else in the picture.

Fatty Mcfatterson

Yep. I'm that good. We may not be done yet this week! Hellfire so fun!

I decided to change the colors of the website to green so we could pretend we are FEL BLADESONG. It's exciting and new content right? right? See what I did there. 

Anyway we have a NEW content patch coming out Tuesday with 13 new bosses to kill so that's exciting. It does however mean for the last time Bladesong will be saying goodbye to a raid tier without clearing it on Mythic. We have improved every single raid for the last two years and this will be no different. We had a few painfully close attempts on Maidens (at least one dead with the others sub 10%) so I think we would have been 8/10M. Alas time was not on our side. We did go back and kill a few of the bosses we failed at pretty hard growing into a mythic guild...


and the bane of our highmaul existance... McLovin is not good at pictures.

Tectus? More like Wreckedus

Our roster is stronger than it has ever been and we have new tricks up our sleeve for 6.2 (Logs is getting snipped IRL..... that's really our trump card.) We want to finish this one 13/13M in the top 10 on Zul'jin. I have no doubt with logs being half the man he use to be we can make that happen. We also have a firm rule that Giznat has to poop at least an hour before the raid in order to be on time/safe. Nismo is not allowed within 100 feet of small children or stuffed animals per a VPO, and we started zaying Zazin's name correctly (You say it like Pazzazz-N) 


FEL-BLADESONG - We can't fucking lose.

Zathien I'm very green and glowy in those pics ... I was fel before it was cool.

I'm going to take tonight's update as a chance to be brutally honest with you. Bladesong is better than your guild. We raid 7.5 to 9 hours a week and I can't remember the last time we failed to kill a new boss in a week. I've tried to soften the blow by making witty jokes about Giznat's asshole, or killing off stuffed animals, but really at some point it's just insulting your intelligence to pretend we aren't awesome. I mean it's Thursday and we killed another new Mythic boss that guilds struggle on for weeks. This is my shocked face ----> yell I'm just messing with you that's my pooping face, and you totally made eye contact.

WTF is wrong with you?

Run a train on Bagels

I'm really pretty proud of how far we have come in such a short time. I mean everyone has really stepped it up...except Giznat. I mean it's not like it's hard to sit at home on an inflatable donut while your anal fissure heals up. But I digress I'm reverting back to my old ways. We still have maybe 2 spots left for exceptional DPS. If you are a terrible DPS please feel free to apply directly with Nismo and explain to him in great detail why you only did 24k DPS on your current guilds last Mythic Gruul kill. He really enjoys that stuff. If you will excuse me I'm going to start working on my Mythic Maiden update now so that it will actually be funny by next week. 

Giznat Hey, I can do 60k DPS as Enhance... just sayin BTW IM BACK! POOP BREAKS ARE BACK IN FULL EFFECT!

I'm not sure what's in the water at Bladesong lately but this kill a new mythic a week pace is killing me when it comes to updating the site. Just kidding please keep doing what you're doing. After having only seen Kromog for a night last week after downing flamebender we went back in with a slightly better game plan. Mainly it involved the guild leader actually doing damage to the pillars when they spawned. Turn's out it worked like a Charm and Kromog fell over in only 32 total attempts. 

Suck it Tectus, We got your bro

Not only did we kill Tectus...I mean Kromog but we also had an entire night this week to play with trains. How fun is that? Not to bring down this feel good update but I did want to take a moment to remember our fallen mascot. A moment of silence please...

Poor butthole

We are looking for exceptional healers and damage dealers to join our increasingly impressive ranks for 6.2 and beyond. I mean we are ranked 20th on the server now so we have to be good right? Screw you highmaul....screw you. 

Giznat Nice Job fellas! I will return soooooooon! This Florida sun is treating me very well ...

Another week, another dead boss. Making updates is getting exhausting! Luckily this one was just a few quick screen caps. Keeping it simple and staying away from the photoshop. After all we are a reputable news website. First off lets get the dirty business out of the way...

She loves the bitches

We made pretty short work of flamebender this week as predicted. We decided to go take a look at Kromog since Irish loves his hallways so much. Everything was going pretty well until suddenly our (now) second best shaman was AFK for Kromog pulls. Not a big deal he just had to use the restroom, I was sure he would be back any minute. The acceptable amount of time to spend in the bathroom came and went and still no Giznat. I decided to check social media in case something had gone wrong and what I found was shocking.

OMG his butt fell out.

I can only assume by the hash tag "#ProlapsedRectum" he was being rushed to the hospital. Apparently he will be gone for the next two weeks "On vacation" while he recovers. We here at bladesong wish you a speedy recovery number 2!

Giznat LOL, sometimes you gotta go... I take prolonged power dumps man.
Combination WHO...DOES....NUMBER TWO....WORK FOR?!?!?!?!?!?!
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